Society conditions men and boys not to cry. However, it has been established that this is unhealthy as men are entitled to vent their emotions as much as women. 'Men do not cry' or 'Crying is for those who are weak both emotionally and physically' are some of the clichéd lines that we hear as we progress through life and we end up saying the same things to our children and other youngsters.
To say that men must not cry has created a delusional thought in the minds of many and they tend to hold back their emotional suffering as much as they can, which in turn leads to severe repercussions. "After research and experience, most clinical counselors are in agreement that prolonged suppression of emotional outbursts leads to severe depression, suicide, substance abuse and even psychotic behaviors," says Raina Bhattacharya a senior and established clinical counselor from Guwahati. "Rage is also a direct outcome of this suppression in many in the long term," she adds.
Tears have cathartic value and help in releasing stress chemicals says a psychiatrist from Delhi on condition of anonymity. "It is believed that crying ultimately releases endorphins that have a feel good factor," he adds. "Infact if criminals are counseled the origin of their psychology that has resulted in the crime can often be traced to emotional pain and conflict that had remained unresolved and much suppressed," shares Bhattacharya.
There have been specific research and studies to prove that mental trauma and stress ultimately manifests in diseases including cancerTherefore it is safe to say that letting emotions and feelings flow freely through tears is the human right of every man over which society and stereotypical thinking cannot infringe.
"Prolonged suppression of tears also leads to cardiac attacks in the long run," says Geetanjali Sharma a cardiac specialist from Guwahati. "Also there have been specific research and studies to prove that mental trauma and stress ultimately manifests in diseases including cancer," she says.
Society will change and the world will change as time advances but the feelings and emotions which we never released in the past either owing to pride or because we were told not to; will end up creeping up on us one fine day. And when that happens, we die along with our feelings and emotions. Therefore when the need arises, let it flow; flow for times gone cannot be felt or brought back.